Finding myself and being happy

I read a quote the other day about things you need to do to be happy. I know it sounds silly... why do we need to be told what we need to be happy. But it is true. We struggle being happy because of silly little things that we cannot let go.  As I began reading the quote I assumed I would be able to say I did everything on the list... but then I got to one and I stopped.  It said, Stop comparing yourself to others.  How many of us do this?? I think especially women have a hard time with this. So I set out to work on it.

Whenever I catch myself comparing I can now acknowledge it and dissuade it. I do it often so at first it was a challenge. I see someone and I think Oh look at her outfit or look how skinny she is... and I want to be that and I get envious or even down on myself because I don't look like that person. Now I try to channel that differently and just say, Oh she is really pretty and has an awesome body or outfit and end story. There is no need to compare myself with her, because I am not her. I am me.

If I can be happy with who I am and what I am doing with me, then there is no need to compare with anyone else. It will just make me unhappy. It is a daily battle, I must admit, but I feel like I'm making progress. In  fact, this is a sad but true story... I would see myself without my hair done and without makeup and just think, yuck! The other day I was getting my hair cut and the lady had my hair all pulled back in a towel and I looked at myself in the mirror and thought, I'm pretty. Where usually I would tear myself apart somehow. We are so mean to ourselves sometimes and I wish we would learn to love ourselves. Nobody is the same, we are all unique and beautiful in our own way.

I feel more confident now than I probably ever have in my life. I am comfortable in my skin. It may have taken 28 years, but I am. I am me and I wouldn't have it any other way.

So challenge yourself to be happy. Find something that you know is holding you back and try to work on changing it so you can be happy inside and out. Life is too short for any other way.

I've been scouring the internet to find that quote, but I can't find it... here is a close second. And when I read it, the next thing I need to work on is Forgiveness. I am a grudge holder and have a lot of people that I haven't forgiven for some reason or another. It is hard for me to forgive... but I will work on it! ;)

Weekend!

This weekend I convinced my hubby to take me out hiking! I can't even tell you how much I miss hiking! I went maybe several times a month for work in my old job, some months more than others and I've only gone once since January! Sad!

So when my hubby asked what I wanted to do this weekend, I quickly piped in, hiking! We went up to an area in Colorado I've been wanting to explore for a few weeks. It was north of Durango a bit and a few rough miles on a dirt road. The trail head was at this cute little pond filled with lily pads and beaver dams. Not something you see in New Mexico! The trail was about 2 1/2 miles round trip and the mid point was a beautiful lake! Spud lake is what it is called. Now I am not a big fan of lakes.. They are usually deep and dark and creepy. I'm always afraid there is some monster that is going to eat me underneath that dark water.... But this lake was different. Maybe cause we hiked uphill it was that much more rewarding and a refreshing sight, but the water was soo clear! If I had brought a bathing suit I probably would have swam in it!

It was a neat little adventure and I will definitely go back! I can't wait to explore more of Colorado! Also, we need to invest in a backpack to carry Colin in! It probably took us triple the time because Colin wanted to hike, which is fine, but he is a dangerous hiker and doesn't always stay on the trail. So I was constantly hovering him as he tried to climb big rocks and sticks... Doing everything the hard way! I love that he is a little adventurer, but if we plan to go out hiking often, we need a backpack! Here are some pictures!

The lessons we learn in church...

Going to church with a toddler is always an adventure. ( No, my church doesn't have a nursery or anything of the sort)

Anywho, I come to church every week armed... Armed with: Sippy cup, snacks...several, in case one isn't what said toddler wanted, books... Lots of books and toy cars that can be driven all over the pew and kneeler with minimal noise.

Colin *usually* does ok in church. He gets a little antsy, but we manage to make it through every week with little chaos. He is loves when it is time to shake people's hands and has started folding his hands to pray which is very cute... But occasionally something out of the ordinary happens and today was one of those days.

We got to church a few minutes late and my husband spotted some seats near the front (where we never usually sit... Don't judge it is easier to leave with a fussy kid when you are in the back!) and we quietly made our way to the seats. We were doing pretty well... Then... Right before communion... Everyone was quietly praying and the deacon was kneeling at the front of the aisle. Colin drops his jeep car and not only does it fall, but it rolls... 5 rows.... and right through the middle of the aisle... Only stopping a few inches from the deacons foot. My heart starts racing and I go in panic mode! I was going to just wait until we were done praying and then go grab it, but then I realized the deacon could easily step backwards on it and fall... And I did not want to be responsible for that! My husband encouraged me that while everyone was praying would be the perfect time to go snatch it! So I did! Judging by the dirty looks I got from some of the older ladies, it may not have been the best time. And yes, people watched it all go down and we had a few chuckles!

Moral of the story... Only vehicles with 3 tires are allowed in church from now on! And Jesus is The Lord! Yeah, we still managed to get a little out of mass! I thank The Lord everyday for blessing me with this angel who makes our, days, nights and especially church much more interesting!

Clingasaurous Colin

Colin has turned into a clingy monster. He was always really close to me, but it has gotten much worse since we moved and I stay home with him 24/7.

I've only been away from him twice since we moved her... Maybe 3 times. And he used to handle it well, now not so much. The other morning I wanted to go for a run without the jogging stroller...so I had Ryan watch him. He literally screamed the entire time I was gone and when I walked through the door he gave me a big hug and didn't let go for about 30 minutes. Sweet, but Daddy didn't think so!

When we were visiting our family last weekend we went out for a little date and  and he was distracted, but very sad the whole time.

I really hope this is just a clingy phase, but I fear I am ruining him forever! I am not ready for him to do daycare or anything, I am thinking maybe a half day or two after he turns 2 and mostly for socialization.  

What do you all think? 

Are your kids clingy or do they go through clingy stages?

In our old town, not only did I work, but I had the next door neighbors babysit a couple times a month so I could exercise.  He loved it and had fun playing while I got my breaks and here in our new place we don't have that.   We still don't know very many people and I haven't met anyone who would be a good sitter yet. I mean I'd trust our neighbors and some friends I've made, but they have their own kids and hands full and I would feel bad asking, unless it was an emergency.

I've heard they go through clingy stages around 18 months, so I'm hoping that is it. And I know the fact that we are still nursing is probably a major factor in this. I just hope he isn't totally clingy his whole life... Then again when I see how scary the world is sometimes I think I will be ok if he never wants to leave my side!  ;)

Here is a phone dump of me and my shadow!

BISTI/DE-NA-ZIN WILDERNESS - Cibola Beacon: Cibola Living

BISTI/DE-NA-ZIN WILDERNESS - Cibola Beacon: Cibola Living

Fame

I'm famous! ;) ok maybe not, but so cool to have your picture and photo credit on the cover of something! :)

 I am getting ready to put more photos in the gallery at my old town, this one maybe with them!

http://www.cibolahospital.com/cgh.nsf/Files/SPRINGSUMMER13/$file/CibolaSpring%202013%20NL.pdf

Daddy's day!

We had a good daddy's day! It was the day after the burial so we were able to see Ryan's dad and grandpa too! Here are some photos of the great dads in my life.  

My hubby is such an amazing daddy to our son!

My dad is quirky and crazy and I love him for it! He sure enjoys being a grandpa! 

We took some great grandparent photos this weekend, with Colin and his cousin Aurelia. They are less than 2 months apart and the apple of their great grandparents eyes!

Colin's pop and uncle pat (or as he says, pap). Uncle pap is Colin's godfather and would do absolutely anything for him! They have such a cute bond!

Pop and Colin! <3 such an awesome grandpa!

Whirlwind

This has been quite a whirlwind of a week or two. We found out last week that my husbands great grandma passed away. We spent the next few days trying to figure out the family's travel arrangements. 

I drove to Albuquerque on Monday, spent the night at my uncles house and then picked up all my inlaws at the airport Tuesday morning. We drove all the way back to our house and spent a few days here and then drove 4 hours south to the town that the funeral was and today we drove back. That is 14 hours of driving in 6 days! 

It was wonderful to see all my hubby's family and celebrate his great grandmas life! She was a wonderful woman who I feel blessed to have known. It had been about 10 years since their family had all reunited and I was just dating Ryan then, but was there for their last reunion! 

All that being said we are exhausted! Colin's sleep has been rather crazy as well! One night he was so over stimulated after meeting a bunch of family he didn't get to bed until midnight! I am very much looking forward to our normal routines!

Will try to get to a daddy's day post tomorrow! Maybe.... :)

Dresses, Dresses and Dresses!

I've been slacking on my fashion posts, so here are THREE in ONE!


Dress 1:

Old Navy Casual dress. I LOVE this dress. I wear it every week! It is so comfy, but from the pictures I guess it isn't quite that flattering, but I could care less... I'm all about comfy! Lol

Dress 2:

And my sunburnt arms! Lol  This was after our lake trip! Ha!
This... is a coughmaternitycough Maxi Dress.   Yeah, that's right.. I said it... it's a maternity dress. I bought it at Motherhood Maternity when I was preggars with Colin to wear to my baby showers. So it may look familiar. BUT I LOVE it. I put a belt on it to disguise its maternity-ness... and I  *think* it looks good! Ha!  Nobody will ever know... until now. I love the color and how comfy it is.  Checkout my colin posing with me... I love the last picture where he is showing off his belly! Ha ha!  Goofball!

Dress 3:

My favorite... and it wasn't my favorite until I saw the pictures!!  This is from Sears, the Kardashian Kollection.  I bought this when we were homeless and clothesless to wear with leggings underneath.  I didn't like the way it fit and haven't worn it again... until today. I saw it in the closet and said to myself, "I wonder what that would like with a belt." Well, the results were pretty magical and I will definitely be wearing it a lot more! :)  And yeah... I was a wannabe model in a former life... don't hate.

No spend June

Well, Ryan and I did a looksee over our budget for the first time since moving and it wasn't too pretty. Basically we went from two salaries and one mortgage to one salary and two mortgages. I think we didn't notice it right away because we got Ryan's sign on bonus and such, so we were doing ok. I am glad we took a look because we really need to cut back until we sell our house in our old town. (Prayers someone falls in loves with it soon!)

So basically we are trying to spend as little money as possible in June, just to see how we can do. I am trying not to buy anything I don't necessarily need. No shopping... Although I had to buy Father's Day presents... So yeah already failed at that! Lol I did go shopping at target the other day for a friend here that just had a baby... But I had a gift card! Soo... I didn't spend anything! Typically we only eat out maybe one night a week, but I am going to try to cook every single meal so we don't have to. And as far as groceries .... I am going to attempt to spend less than 100 bucks a week. I only spent 60 bucks at the store this week and I bought dog food... I thought that was rather impressive.... And I have enough food to last well over a week!

The thing that may screw up my grocery budget is we are having company next week. My in laws and brother in law are coming for a few days so I will have to cook for double the people! I think I can do it though! We are also heading out of town for my husbands great grandmas funeral. Most of the food should be taken care of, but we may have to eat out a few meals there.

I have to say all this money talk makes me feel pretty guilty about not working! I know we would have other expenses if I did work like childcare to account for, but it makes me feel bad to not be able to contribute. I know once we sell our house this will not be an issue, I just wish we could sell it already! Maybe someone will buy one of my prints at the gallery and we can have free groceries for a few months! Lol I have had zero luck trying to get other newspapers across the state to pick up my articles, so I definitely don't think that will be a money maker for me, just something to do for fun, really and to keep my skills up.

Anyway, any advice on not spending or cheap healthy meals would be greatly appreciated!

Weekend getaway

This weekend we planned a camping trip to Colorado. We had gone up to Vallecito, Co last summer, but now that we moved we are only about an hour and a half from the lake there.... Which is awesome! We had talked with some friends about making a trip there, we have a camper and they have a boat.... So you know, perfect match! Ha!

We had a great time. Colin loved the boap, as he called it and yelled go go go for them to drive fast! They also brought their puppy who Colin followed everywhere. I love camping and being in nature for a few days. It is so relaxing and just centers me. And I love that Colin loves it too! Between sticks and pine cones at our campsite to kicking his feet in the lake, he was in heaven.

Now I have a few days of laundry and cleaning of the camper... But it was so very worth it! I can't wait until our next camping trip! Here are a ton of pictures!