What makes a home a home?
As I sit here staring at my bare walls and floor covered in moving boxes, I can't help but think that my home, without all this stuff... Almost naked on the inside... is now just a house, not home anymore.
I keep wondering when our new house will feel like home and not somebody else's home or not just a house. We haven't even gotten there yet, but to me, when I see it in my head it is someone else's. hopefully as we get settled in it will slowly become our home. I am super excited that we are putting in new carpet because I feel like it will make it more ours. The more little changes we can do to make it feel like our space the happier I will be.
I have my work cut out for me.... Poor Colin is sick and miserable. Our furniture and everything gets delivered on Monday... Ryan's first day of work. Luckily my folks are coming up to help us with the move, but they leave Tuesday. So I envision me with a bunch of boxes and a sick kid for the rest of the week! We also haven't set up our Internet yet so I maybe MIA for a bit! But I am excited to find a place for everything in our new house and to get organized!
Here's to turning a house into a home... One box at a time!
PS. I worry a lot about Colin getting reacquainted with a new house. I know he is young and he probably won't care, but I like to worry so... Yeah. I sure hope it doesn't affect him too much. But I know one thing he will love... Every room as low windows that look out our backyard and he is obsessed with our dog... So he should thoroughly enjoy that!
Thursday, January 31, 2013
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Monday, January 28, 2013
Night weaning...
Last week we had a rough couple nights of sleep. Literally the same day that Colin only asked to nurse twice during the day... Twice, he just never asked for it.... He was up every single hour nursing that night! The next day we were up every hour as well. I was just tired of not sleeping and so I decided I would try night weaning.
I initially was going to start on Colin's sleep after we moved, but with both Ryan and I having this week off, I figured what better time to start.... Rather than like Ryan's first week of work.... having him hear Colin crying all night or something.
I started Friday night and every time Colin woke up and asked for milk I told him the milks were sleeping and he had to wait until the morning. That first night he woke up 6 times asking for milk. He would only cry for maybe a minute before going back to sleep and I just slept with him on the spare bed in his nursery. The next night he woke up 4 times and then last night 2 times. Last night when I told him the milks were sleeping he didn't even fuss and just went right back to sleep!
Here is hoping this is a good start to sleeping longer than a few hours at a time!
I initially was going to start on Colin's sleep after we moved, but with both Ryan and I having this week off, I figured what better time to start.... Rather than like Ryan's first week of work.... having him hear Colin crying all night or something.
I started Friday night and every time Colin woke up and asked for milk I told him the milks were sleeping and he had to wait until the morning. That first night he woke up 6 times asking for milk. He would only cry for maybe a minute before going back to sleep and I just slept with him on the spare bed in his nursery. The next night he woke up 4 times and then last night 2 times. Last night when I told him the milks were sleeping he didn't even fuss and just went right back to sleep!
Here is hoping this is a good start to sleeping longer than a few hours at a time!
Friday, January 25, 2013
No more work...
Today was my last day of work and I must admit it was quite bittersweet.
I seriously work for the best agency ever, I am so spoiled and truly loved my job and (most of) the people I worked with.
Over the past two days I have been showered by gifts, cards, hugs and kind words by almost everyone I have ever worked with. It really doesn't get any better than that... T know that you will be missed and were loved and appreciated. It is something that is sure hard to walk away from. But at the same time... Change is good and something we all need and I am excited for my new adventure.
Someone asked me today if I was sad and I quickly said, No! But I have been thinking of that all day. No, I am not sad yet, because I am excited about our new adventure, but I know I will be sad.... It just hasn't me yet. I will be sad in a few weeks, I am sure... When I am all alone and pulling my hair out chasing after a toddler... I am sure I will miss it... But then he will smile or give me a big wet kiss and he will help lessen my sadness. That is what kids are good for, always to help lighten the mood. I am confident I am doing the right thing. I know it may not always be easy, but what in life worth caring about is?
So onward and upward. I will not cry because I am happy and smiling that it happened and I had an excellent ride!
I seriously work for the best agency ever, I am so spoiled and truly loved my job and (most of) the people I worked with.
Over the past two days I have been showered by gifts, cards, hugs and kind words by almost everyone I have ever worked with. It really doesn't get any better than that... T know that you will be missed and were loved and appreciated. It is something that is sure hard to walk away from. But at the same time... Change is good and something we all need and I am excited for my new adventure.
Someone asked me today if I was sad and I quickly said, No! But I have been thinking of that all day. No, I am not sad yet, because I am excited about our new adventure, but I know I will be sad.... It just hasn't me yet. I will be sad in a few weeks, I am sure... When I am all alone and pulling my hair out chasing after a toddler... I am sure I will miss it... But then he will smile or give me a big wet kiss and he will help lessen my sadness. That is what kids are good for, always to help lighten the mood. I am confident I am doing the right thing. I know it may not always be easy, but what in life worth caring about is?
So onward and upward. I will not cry because I am happy and smiling that it happened and I had an excellent ride!
Sunday, January 20, 2013
Friday, January 18, 2013
14.5 month update!
I thought I'd do a little update on Colin... I miss doing his monthly updates. :(
At 14 months old... he is SOO much fun!! I love this age!
He waves Hello and Bye Bye. He makes the sign for no more or all gone ALL the time (when you take something away from him, when he drops something or moves something or walks away from something! The other day he threw his toy in the trash can and walked over to tell me it was all gone and then the next day he put his fire truck in the drier and came to get me to rescue it, while pointing ot the drier and making the sign for all gone!) He is still making the sign for milk very religiously. He also claps his hands and gives head butts... courtesy of our next door neighbor.
He isn't saying words yet, but he is DYING to talk. He jibbers all day long saying all kinds of lovely nonsense. He does bark like a dog and say Brrrr... when he gets cold.
He knows where his head, hair, ears, eyes, nose, tongue, belly, hands and feet are and can identify them not only on himself but on other people/things. He gives hugs and kisses and loves.
He is soo active. He just walks around looking for things to do and playing with his toys is not sufficient for vrey long. He prefers taking everything out of my cabinets and drawers, feeding the dog, taking the balls out of the pool table... and right now he is walking around the house pulling the broom behind him... hey maybe he is getting a bit of sweeping done, I'm not complaining! Lol He loves to climb everything and anything and tries to run everywhere too.
He still isn't sleeping well (I plan to work on that after we move) But he falls asleep in his crib every night, just doesn't stay that way for long. He was sleeping 3-4 hours at a time in his crib, but that changed to just two over the past few weeks... BUT he is cutting molars, maybe thats why?? But I feel like a more functional human being so I must be getting some sleep!
He loves most fruits, green beans, broccoli, oatmeal and cheese... especially cream cheese. He drinks whole milk really well and has put on good weight since he turned one! At his one year appointment he was 18 lbs. I weighed him this morning and he was 21! That is incredible! Lol I think he is at least 32 inches tall because he was about 30 at his one year apt. But I that is just a guess. He is finally wearing 18 month clothes and in size 4 diapers.
I love him so much! He is such a happy little boy. He loves to be the center of attention and dance and do silly things, just like his silly grandpas! I know I will have a little clown, he is such a character!
Ok, I guess that is all for now!
At 14 months old... he is SOO much fun!! I love this age!
He waves Hello and Bye Bye. He makes the sign for no more or all gone ALL the time (when you take something away from him, when he drops something or moves something or walks away from something! The other day he threw his toy in the trash can and walked over to tell me it was all gone and then the next day he put his fire truck in the drier and came to get me to rescue it, while pointing ot the drier and making the sign for all gone!) He is still making the sign for milk very religiously. He also claps his hands and gives head butts... courtesy of our next door neighbor.
He isn't saying words yet, but he is DYING to talk. He jibbers all day long saying all kinds of lovely nonsense. He does bark like a dog and say Brrrr... when he gets cold.
He knows where his head, hair, ears, eyes, nose, tongue, belly, hands and feet are and can identify them not only on himself but on other people/things. He gives hugs and kisses and loves.
He is soo active. He just walks around looking for things to do and playing with his toys is not sufficient for vrey long. He prefers taking everything out of my cabinets and drawers, feeding the dog, taking the balls out of the pool table... and right now he is walking around the house pulling the broom behind him... hey maybe he is getting a bit of sweeping done, I'm not complaining! Lol He loves to climb everything and anything and tries to run everywhere too.
He still isn't sleeping well (I plan to work on that after we move) But he falls asleep in his crib every night, just doesn't stay that way for long. He was sleeping 3-4 hours at a time in his crib, but that changed to just two over the past few weeks... BUT he is cutting molars, maybe thats why?? But I feel like a more functional human being so I must be getting some sleep!
He loves most fruits, green beans, broccoli, oatmeal and cheese... especially cream cheese. He drinks whole milk really well and has put on good weight since he turned one! At his one year appointment he was 18 lbs. I weighed him this morning and he was 21! That is incredible! Lol I think he is at least 32 inches tall because he was about 30 at his one year apt. But I that is just a guess. He is finally wearing 18 month clothes and in size 4 diapers.
I love him so much! He is such a happy little boy. He loves to be the center of attention and dance and do silly things, just like his silly grandpas! I know I will have a little clown, he is such a character!
Ok, I guess that is all for now!
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Our new home?!
If all goes as planned, THIS will be our new home in a few weeks. It is a bit smaller than our current home, but not by much. I like its different layout and it has a sweet master bath and giant walk in closet. :)
I really love the neighborhood, it is quiet and away from town, and a great place to raise kids! I can't wait to move, but wish we could sell our house soon!
I really love the neighborhood, it is quiet and away from town, and a great place to raise kids! I can't wait to move, but wish we could sell our house soon!
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
SAHM
So I made a HUGE decision.
I have decided that when we move I am not going to work and I am going to spend my days staying home and loving on Colin... while he still lets me know.
I know that their time when they are little is soo short and I dont want to miss out on it anymore. I feel like jobs will come and go, but this time with Colin won't last forever.
I have been super giddy since I've made the decision. I looked up activities that Colin and I can do together in Farmington and there is so much. ... They have a huge library, a children's museum and a giant aquatic center. Plus I learned this weekend that there are over 50 parks... 50!!!! The town I live in now probably has 5! Lol I can't wait for it to warm up a bit so we can go explore all the parks!
So that is my news. To me it is HUGE and I am very excited! :)
I have decided that when we move I am not going to work and I am going to spend my days staying home and loving on Colin... while he still lets me know.
I know that their time when they are little is soo short and I dont want to miss out on it anymore. I feel like jobs will come and go, but this time with Colin won't last forever.
I have been super giddy since I've made the decision. I looked up activities that Colin and I can do together in Farmington and there is so much. ... They have a huge library, a children's museum and a giant aquatic center. Plus I learned this weekend that there are over 50 parks... 50!!!! The town I live in now probably has 5! Lol I can't wait for it to warm up a bit so we can go explore all the parks!
So that is my news. To me it is HUGE and I am very excited! :)
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
An Extended Breastfeeder...
Well, I guess I am officially an extended breast feeder. Honestly I never thought I'd be here in this "category". Heck, my initial breastfeeding goal was only 3 months... I said 6, but in reality I would have been happy if I made it 3 months. Now I'm still nursing my 14 month old.
I am having a rough time with this new category. I feel like there isn't much support for those who choose to breastfeed longer than a year. Over the holidays it was suggested by both sides of the family that I should stop nursing and I know my husband is starting to think we've gone on with this too long as well. Maybe I'm weird, but I don't feel like I'm ready to quit... and Colin sure as heck isn't ready either. He has cut back since we introduced whole milk, but he still nurses quite a bit, especially if he is teething. It is a comfort thing, I know. I'd like weaning to be a nice slow gradual process... not like a sudden, oh yeah, those milks you like... they are gone forever... sorry kid. Kinda process.
It is weird... I feel like nursing is all we know and I'm afraid to give that up. How will I get him to fall back to sleep so easily at night when he wakes up... OR will he wake up less because he isn't nursing and knows he won't have those comforts anymore? I just don't know.
I do know that I still feel comfortable nursing him and love our bonding time and closeness that we get to share and I just don't quite feel ready to give that up, especially with a big move coming up.
Once we move I am going to try to cut back on night time nursing and work on getting this kid to sleep a bit better. I don't mind getting up and nursing him once... maybe even twice a night... but anything more than that needs to stop.... so I can regain some sanity.
I just wish people would be more supportive about nursing and nursing past one. And I wish people would support me as I continue on. I don't know how long we will go. It would be nice to get my body back, but for now this is what I'm doing and anyone who doesn't like it, will just have to deal with it. :) Lol I am an extended breast feeder and proud of it! Just don't say anything about it to piss me off! Lol
Sorry for the randomness of this blog... my mind is a mess today! :)
I am having a rough time with this new category. I feel like there isn't much support for those who choose to breastfeed longer than a year. Over the holidays it was suggested by both sides of the family that I should stop nursing and I know my husband is starting to think we've gone on with this too long as well. Maybe I'm weird, but I don't feel like I'm ready to quit... and Colin sure as heck isn't ready either. He has cut back since we introduced whole milk, but he still nurses quite a bit, especially if he is teething. It is a comfort thing, I know. I'd like weaning to be a nice slow gradual process... not like a sudden, oh yeah, those milks you like... they are gone forever... sorry kid. Kinda process.
It is weird... I feel like nursing is all we know and I'm afraid to give that up. How will I get him to fall back to sleep so easily at night when he wakes up... OR will he wake up less because he isn't nursing and knows he won't have those comforts anymore? I just don't know.
I do know that I still feel comfortable nursing him and love our bonding time and closeness that we get to share and I just don't quite feel ready to give that up, especially with a big move coming up.
Once we move I am going to try to cut back on night time nursing and work on getting this kid to sleep a bit better. I don't mind getting up and nursing him once... maybe even twice a night... but anything more than that needs to stop.... so I can regain some sanity.
I just wish people would be more supportive about nursing and nursing past one. And I wish people would support me as I continue on. I don't know how long we will go. It would be nice to get my body back, but for now this is what I'm doing and anyone who doesn't like it, will just have to deal with it. :) Lol I am an extended breast feeder and proud of it! Just don't say anything about it to piss me off! Lol
Sorry for the randomness of this blog... my mind is a mess today! :)
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Thursday, January 3, 2013
To Work or Not to Work... THAT is the question
Since we decided we were moving I've been having a major debate with myself. Should I stay home with Colin or should I work? I literally go back and forth on a daily basis. Why is this decision so hard?
At first I was all set to quit my job and never look back. I was envisioning a lovely life as a stay at home mom lounging around the house in pjs on our days home and museum hopping on our days out. Sleeping in and taking afternoon naps together... oh the thought was so glorious!
THEN I got a phone call from the manager of my company in Farmington, basically saying he heard I was moving there and wanted me to work for him. He even talked about a position that would give me a raise. How do you say no to that? Plus I am a government employee and have been working with this company for almost 10 years. Hard to throw that away too.
I hate the idea of dropping Colin off with strangers. We've been so spoiled here with a wonderful lady who watches him and I know that they both love and care about each other very much and I don't ever worry about him when I drop him off. I see him laugh with her and hug her and I know he has a great time while I am at work. Until I find THAT I don't think I will be happy about the idea of working.
I WISH I could work part time. Although it isn't looking like that will be an option for me there, which stinks. I feel like part time is my happy medium so I can both be a mommy and stay with my career. So I then feel like I have to choose between working and staying home. I don't need to work, but I like to work.
My other option is leaving the government and finding a part time job doing something else, but still working and just being part time.
I've decided to wait to make a full on decision until we move and get settled and I investigate some of the day cares and such there.
Although I hate waiting and I hate that this is so hard. I wish there was an easy solution. But nothing in life is easy. I just hope I don't have any regrets with whatever I do decide.
At first I was all set to quit my job and never look back. I was envisioning a lovely life as a stay at home mom lounging around the house in pjs on our days home and museum hopping on our days out. Sleeping in and taking afternoon naps together... oh the thought was so glorious!
THEN I got a phone call from the manager of my company in Farmington, basically saying he heard I was moving there and wanted me to work for him. He even talked about a position that would give me a raise. How do you say no to that? Plus I am a government employee and have been working with this company for almost 10 years. Hard to throw that away too.
I hate the idea of dropping Colin off with strangers. We've been so spoiled here with a wonderful lady who watches him and I know that they both love and care about each other very much and I don't ever worry about him when I drop him off. I see him laugh with her and hug her and I know he has a great time while I am at work. Until I find THAT I don't think I will be happy about the idea of working.
I WISH I could work part time. Although it isn't looking like that will be an option for me there, which stinks. I feel like part time is my happy medium so I can both be a mommy and stay with my career. So I then feel like I have to choose between working and staying home. I don't need to work, but I like to work.
My other option is leaving the government and finding a part time job doing something else, but still working and just being part time.
I've decided to wait to make a full on decision until we move and get settled and I investigate some of the day cares and such there.
Although I hate waiting and I hate that this is so hard. I wish there was an easy solution. But nothing in life is easy. I just hope I don't have any regrets with whatever I do decide.
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Our big news...
So our big news is that in 2013 we will be moving. My husband got offered a job in Farmington, NM so that is where we will be headed to in a few weeks time.
This is very bittersweet for me. I am very excited for this opportunity for his career and for him. I am excited to move to a bigger city that actually has more than 2 stores to shop in and more than 5 restaurants to rotate from. BUT I will miss life here. I will my our home... Colin's first home. I will my job and the flexibility it allows to be a mommy. I will miss all the friends we have made her over the past almost 5 years as well. But I know we can take our friendships with us to our new town and make them come visit us and vice versa.
Moving is a little unsettling for me. All the unknowns. I was raised in the same house and in the same town throughout my entire childhood. Sure I moved around a bit while I was in college and stuff, but I prefer a sedimentary lifestyle. Moving scares me! Lol
But I'd rather move now while Colin is young... before he makes friends and such. He is too little now, everyone is his friend! :)
Anyway I will blog more about our move and my job situation later!
This is very bittersweet for me. I am very excited for this opportunity for his career and for him. I am excited to move to a bigger city that actually has more than 2 stores to shop in and more than 5 restaurants to rotate from. BUT I will miss life here. I will my our home... Colin's first home. I will my job and the flexibility it allows to be a mommy. I will miss all the friends we have made her over the past almost 5 years as well. But I know we can take our friendships with us to our new town and make them come visit us and vice versa.
Moving is a little unsettling for me. All the unknowns. I was raised in the same house and in the same town throughout my entire childhood. Sure I moved around a bit while I was in college and stuff, but I prefer a sedimentary lifestyle. Moving scares me! Lol
But I'd rather move now while Colin is young... before he makes friends and such. He is too little now, everyone is his friend! :)
Anyway I will blog more about our move and my job situation later!
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Finally an Update!
I will be able to reveal our big news tomorrow!
On another note... we had a great Christmas and great New Years!
We went to visit our family for Christmas and had an Italian Christmas at my Uncle's house. We ate entirely too much, but it was wonderful! My favorite present was the ipad Ryan got me! I have been obsessed with it... to say the least! Lol. Colin got waay more presents than he needs, but he has been enjoying them!! We put a bunch of presents he doesn't play with often or that he got for his birthday away in a big box... so he can focus on his Christmas presents and so our living room isn't as overwhelmed! :) We will switch them out when he gets tired of his new presents!
Our New Years was great... we actually went on our second date since becoming parents! It was rather spontaneous. I just decided I'd ask the neighbor girl if she was free for a few hours and she was! (SCORE!) We were just going to go out to dinner... but Ryan wanted to go to the casino. I am proud to say I doubled my money. But the truth is I only play with 20 bucks! Ha! :) I love playing the roulette table because I can play with 20 bucks for a good hour and usually walk away even. I was TRYING to lose so we could leave and I hit big, winning 40 bucks! :) Then I cashed out and we went home! Ryan did really well on the slots while I was running the tables too... so we both came out on top and had a lot of fun!
I've decided to make reasonable New Years Resolutions this year. Instead of ones that I will likely break a few weeks/months into the year. So this year I want to:
Colin has been really funny lately. He finally learned to clap. He makes this cute sign with his hands when you say no more or all gone! He is babbling like crazy and makes everyone laugh when he does it. He does a booty dance... which is really cute. Lol What else? I switched him to size 4 diapers finally! We've been in 3's forever! And he wore his first 18 month outfit today! Oh yes and he has been cleaning for me... if you give him a wipe or a paper towel he will find something to wipe up with it... his favorite is spitting and wiping it up... total boy! He also has been following directions very well. If I ask him to get me something or do something 9/10 times he will do it! Which is really neat. Today, he put his truck in the drier and shut the door and then came to get me, pointing towards to drier! Always keeps me on my toys, that boy!
He has been falling asleep in his crib and he will stay there 3 or 4 hours every night... even when we were visiting family over the holidays he did it! Yay!
Hope you all are well in this New Year and 2013 blesses beyond belief! Stay tuned for our big news!
On another note... we had a great Christmas and great New Years!
We went to visit our family for Christmas and had an Italian Christmas at my Uncle's house. We ate entirely too much, but it was wonderful! My favorite present was the ipad Ryan got me! I have been obsessed with it... to say the least! Lol. Colin got waay more presents than he needs, but he has been enjoying them!! We put a bunch of presents he doesn't play with often or that he got for his birthday away in a big box... so he can focus on his Christmas presents and so our living room isn't as overwhelmed! :) We will switch them out when he gets tired of his new presents!
Our New Years was great... we actually went on our second date since becoming parents! It was rather spontaneous. I just decided I'd ask the neighbor girl if she was free for a few hours and she was! (SCORE!) We were just going to go out to dinner... but Ryan wanted to go to the casino. I am proud to say I doubled my money. But the truth is I only play with 20 bucks! Ha! :) I love playing the roulette table because I can play with 20 bucks for a good hour and usually walk away even. I was TRYING to lose so we could leave and I hit big, winning 40 bucks! :) Then I cashed out and we went home! Ryan did really well on the slots while I was running the tables too... so we both came out on top and had a lot of fun!
I've decided to make reasonable New Years Resolutions this year. Instead of ones that I will likely break a few weeks/months into the year. So this year I want to:
- Go on more dates with my husband.
- Get Colin to sleep better.
- Get back into the 120's with my weight. (I am close... a few pounds off... so I SHOULD be able to accomplish it... I hope! Lol)
Colin has been really funny lately. He finally learned to clap. He makes this cute sign with his hands when you say no more or all gone! He is babbling like crazy and makes everyone laugh when he does it. He does a booty dance... which is really cute. Lol What else? I switched him to size 4 diapers finally! We've been in 3's forever! And he wore his first 18 month outfit today! Oh yes and he has been cleaning for me... if you give him a wipe or a paper towel he will find something to wipe up with it... his favorite is spitting and wiping it up... total boy! He also has been following directions very well. If I ask him to get me something or do something 9/10 times he will do it! Which is really neat. Today, he put his truck in the drier and shut the door and then came to get me, pointing towards to drier! Always keeps me on my toys, that boy!
He has been falling asleep in his crib and he will stay there 3 or 4 hours every night... even when we were visiting family over the holidays he did it! Yay!
Hope you all are well in this New Year and 2013 blesses beyond belief! Stay tuned for our big news!
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