I've been trying to work on becoming a better and happier me and I feel like the next thing I need to work on is forgiveness, but I'm not really sure where to start.
I have a lot of issues with my family. Specifically cousins. We all got into a disagreement a good 6 years and we still don't speak. I had one apologize to me last yearish via Facebook, but she has since deleted her account and I don't really know how to contact her to show that I truly forgive her. Her sister never apologized and probably never will. So I guess the whole point of forgiving is to accept the apology even if they never give it?? That would be the bigger thing to do. But apart of me is mad still that they were so rude and disrespectful and hurtful. I mean I didn't even invite them to my wedding! Lol that's a big deal! How do I get over this and move forward so I can have a relationship with them again? I reached out to their mom, my aunt today. I haven't really spoken to her either, since this all went down. But I hate that Colin hasn't met her and she was always an awesome aunt to me. So that is my first step.
Then there is another cousin who I was very close with growing up. His parents divorced and that caused a lot of family tension. I was busy with my life and starting my family as was he and we grew apart. I got an email from him when I was like 6 months pregnant that he was disowning me and our side of the family. Lol... oh ok. Looking back i should have just said, ok bye! lol but i was pregnant and hormonal so it brought out some furry and pissed off my husband for making his preggars wife upset so I'm not sure it is fixable. He hasn't even spoken to his dad, my uncle, since then. I'm thinking that is a lost cause??? I saw a picture of him the other day and it made me sad that we don't talk. We've never met each others kids. But you can't change someone and I guess if I'm disowned then we probably never will. I often wonder what would happen if I ran into them. Would I stop to say hello or pretend I didn't know them and keep on walking.
I feel like my family fell apart after my grandma died. She was the glue. We always gathered at her house for every holiday even if we were bickering and we just let it all go. I feel like she would be so disappointed to know that half her family doesn't speak. I'm not sure I can fix it, but I'd like to at least be on speaking terms with most of them! So I am going to make some efforts. Lets see what happens. Any advice would be appreciated!!!
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